INDAY JOKES PART 6

Image Source

How dare you to insinuate such intolerable act of abusing our nature from a mere scrap of humanity such as you. If u further insist, i’ll b forced to use my mental and physical capabilities just to pulverize u! -Litanya ni inday nung may nagtapon ng balat ng kendi sa tapat ng bhay ng amo nya. Nagmamaldita tlaga ang lola mo!
====================================
Hell is a place with big houses, luxurious cars, grate tasting dishes and nonstop parties. And Heaven? It’s only a small room with nothing in it…but YOU….
-message ni inday para kay dudung sa kanilang 1st monthsary
====================================
Amo:Inday ano ulam natin? Darating na sir mo.

Inday:Due to the infrequent mass media coverage around hog cholera, I’d consequently given a judgement on sauteing exquisite scallops in unsalted butter together w/ pungent white onion & tossed it w/ brisk asparagus. I’d also assented to twist it w/ fresh lemon zest & advance its taste via blending a petty amount of chardonay whitewine as well as a cup of viscous cream.

Amo:(napatumbling)
====================================
Sometimes, we fall in love and thought that it would be endless, we thank God for it.. but when someone comes and to make life better, what can we ask God then? You know what, I would ask God to make me love again… and this time.. make it permanent..
-Sinabi ni Inday sa kanyang sarili ng iwan siya ni Dodong.
====================================
What separates men from animals is his ability to talk and express his feelings. History has told us to fight when our right to communicate and self-expression is suppressed. If you don’t like what I say, the way I say it, or the manner I do it, I apologize. But don’t hinder me from practising my inherent right.
-Sagot ni Inday ng mahuling nakikipagchismisan sa kapitbahay.
====================================
Much as I would want to indulge in the proliferation of such incident and malicious information, I want to lift the stigma and alleviate society’s perception of our profession. we are not here to thrive on humor but rather, we should engage in objective and top of the line service to our designated employers.
-Inday (tumangging makipagtsismisan sa katulong sa kabilang bahay. Professionalism at its best!====================================
I’m still a human being, attracted to anyone my heart beats on, and I have my limitations in controlling my feelings. I have to push myself into not loving him. This is so wrong…
-Si Inday na-inlove sa amo. Ibang level na talaga…
====================================
Pinag-aralan ng amo ni Inday ang dictionary para may pangtapat siya kay Inday.

Amo: So Inday, tell me, how do you accept the fact that you are just a mere chambermaid in this extravagant mansion?

Inday: Una camarera? Eres tan pathetic. La unica razon que inscribi tu casa es porque nada esta sucediendo dentro de tu casa cuasi-agradable. Quisiera traer una poca clase en este hogar pero conjeturo que nopuedo porque esta casa es fea.
Amo: Asan na ba yung Spanish dictionary ko… Love!!! Tulong please…
====================================
NEXT ARTICLE:

APPROVED CANDIDATES FOR THE 2010 ELECTIONS, PRESIDENTIAL, VICE-PRESIDENTIAL, AND SENATORIABLES

APPROVED CANDIDATES FOR THE 2010 ELECTIONS, PRESIDENTIAL, VICE-PRESIDENTIAL, AND SENATORIABLES

Image Source 

MANILA, Philippines (UPDATE) - The Commission on Elections released Tuesday the full list of candidates whose candidacies for the 2010 elections have been approved.


Included in the list of official presidential candidates are: (8 out of 99)

1. Sen. Benigno "Noynoy" Aquino III
2. Olongapo City Councilor Juan Carlos "JC" de los Reyes.
3. Former president Joseph Estrada
4. Sen. Richard Gordon
5. Sen. Ana Maria Consuelo "Jamby" Madrigal
6. Former defense secretary Gilbert Teodoro
7. Sen. Manuel Villar
8. Bro. Eddie Villanueva

For vice-president, the candidates approved by Comelec are: (8 out of 20)

1. Makati Mayor Jejomar Binay
2. Ang Kapatiran bet Dominador Chipeco Jr.
3. Former Metro Manila Development Authority chairman Bayani Fernando
4. Sen. Loren Legarda
5. Actor Edu Manzano
6. Sen. Manuel Roxas
7. Journalist Jay Sonza
8. Former Securities and Exchange Commission chairman Perfecto Yasay Jr.

For senator, the candidates approved by the poll body are: (58 out of 158)

1. Nereus Acosta Jr. - LP
2. Sharuff Ibrahim Albani - KBL
3. Zafrullah Alonto - Bangon Pilipinas
4. Ana Theresia Baraquel - LP
5. Jv Larion Bautista - PMP
6. Martin Bautista - LP
7. Silvestre Bello III - Lakas Kampi Cmd
8. Rozzano Rufino Biazon - LP
9. Bong Revilla - Lakas Kampi Cmd
10. Henry Caunan - PDP Laban
11. Pia Cayetano - NP
12. Rizalito David - Ang Kapatiran
13. Joey De Venecia - PMP
14. Miriam Defensor Santiago - People's Reform Party
15. Franklin Drilon - LP
16. Juan Ponce Enrile - PMP
17. Jinggoy Estrada - Pmpt
18. Ramon Guico - Lakas Kami Cmd
19. Teofisto Guingona III - LP
20. Jo Aurea Imbong - Ang Kapatiran
21. Kata Inocencio - Bangon Pilipinas
22. Alexander Lacson - LP
23. Raul Lambino - Lakas Kampi Cmd
24. Rey Langit - Lakas Kampi Cmd
25. Yasmin Lao - LP
26. Lito Lapid - Lakas Kampi Command
27. Alma Lood - KBL
28. Apolinario Lozada - PMP
29. Regalado Maambong - KBL
30. Ferdinand “Bongbong” Marcos Jr - NP
31. Liza Maza - Independent
32. Ma Judea Millora - KBL
33. Ramon Mitra - NP
34. Ramoncito Ocampo - Bangon Pilipinas
35. Satur Ocampo - Bayan Muna Party
36. Susan Ople - NP
37. Sergio Osmeña III - Independent
38. Jovito Palparan Jr. - Independent
39. Imelda Papin - KBL
40. Zosimo Paredes - Ang Kapatiran
41. Gwendolyn Pimentel - PDP Laban
42. Rodolfo Plaza - NPC
43. Reynaldo Princesa - Bangon Pilipinas
44. Ariel Querubin - NP
45. Ralph Recto - LP
46. Gilbert Remulla - NP
47. Ma. Gracia Riñoza-Plazo - Ang Kapatiran
48. Sonia Roco - LP
49. Adrian Sison - Ang Kapatiran
50. Vicente Sotto III - NPC
51. Adel Tamano - NP
52. Reginald Tamayo - Ang Kapatiran
53. Hector Tarrazona - Ang Kapatiran
54. Francisco Tatad - Grand Alliance For Democracy/Gabaybayan
55. Alexander Tinsay - Bangon Pilipinas
56. Manuel Valdehuesa Jr. - Ang Kapatiran
57. Hector Villanueva - KBL
58. Israel Virgines - Bangon Pilipinas

On the other hand, among those disqualified by the commission was environmentalist Nicanor Perlas, who filed his candidacy for the presidency.

The Comelec said disqualified candidates can submit their motions opposing the decision until Monday, December 21. With a report from Ryan Chua, ABS-CBN News

Source: http://www.abs-cbnnews.com/nation/12/15/09/comelec-approves-16-presidential-vp-bets
======================================
NEXT ARTICLE:

INDAY JOKES PART 5

INDAY JOKES PART 5

Image Source

INDAY: Success is often the result of taking misstep in the right direction. Show me a person who has never made a mistake and I’ll show you somebody who has never achieved much.


AMO: Impostora! Lumayas ka dito!
===================================
INDAY: Physical and excessive work may result to serious damage to ones body. It is therefore essential that once in a while we take a break from our usual routine to replenish the lost energy we once had-Sabi ni Inday sa Amo nya nung humingi sya ng day off
====================================
AMO: Inday, bakit mo binenta yung sira na silya?

INDAY: I have computed the chair’s value less cost to sell, and the value in use using projections for 5 years and a pretax discount rate. Accordingly, the value in use is lower, so I decided to sell the chair. This is an accordance with PAS18 on revenue, PAS16 on PPE, and PAS36 on Impairment of Assets.

AMO: *fainted*
-Si Inday talaga, accountant din pala!
====================================
“The statute restricts me to love you but you have the provocation. The way you smile is the proximate cause why I love you. We have some rules to think of. We have no vested rights to love each other because the upper household dismissed my petition!”
-ganito nakipagbreak si Inday kay Dodong (driver ng kapitbahay)
====================================
“La vida no es una broma actualmente. El dinero es tan duro de pasar. Puede usted bajar el precio parci mi? Soy ya su compradora avido diario por favor?
-si Inday tumatawad sa merkado ng isinama siya ng amo sa España
====================================
“Bloody hell!!! What the f*ck did just landed on my cutie top? I mean I’ve spent all day just to make myself look fabulous. I think I’ll have this eewy thing removed in a whip wham of time!”
-reaction ni Inday nung natalsikan sya ng mantika habang nagluluto ng tilapia
====================================
“Off you go! Under no circumstance this house would relent to such unabashed display of vagrant destitution! “-si Inday, pinapaalis ang makulit na pulubi sa gate… (Taray talaga ni Inday!
====================================
Did it ever occur to you that the ultraviolet rays of the idiot box can bring harmful radiation to the retinal area? It could lead to blurred vision, worse, permanent blindness?
-pinagalitan ni inday si junior sa sobrang lapit manood ng kokey! (wahahahaha!)
====================================
Thank you for calling. This is Indigh. How can I provide you world class service today?
-Inday. Nag-call center na. Finally!
====================================
“Don’t limit my capacity in the 4 corners of this luxurious abode. Expose me to the real challenges of the outside world. I want to grow as an individual with dynamic experiences.”
-Inday, nagrereklamo dahil ayaw isama sa Enchanted Kingdom .
====================================
“i pity you for you have degraded you’re very own pride and dignity by resorting to this despicable behavior just for wealth. and i hope tha one day you’ll realize that you should not use humans as means of your ends. as what the great philosopher Kant uttered, “treat a man as an end in himself”.!
-sagot ni inday sa holdaper na nanghoholdap sa kanya.

Shut up,because if you don’t, the bullet in this gun will rest upon your empty head!
– sagot holdaper –
ang sosyal na talaga nila!!!
====================================
Dear Inday,

I’m sorry to inform you that your resignation was denied by the upper management due to your contract of 5 years or make love with the amo clause. We look forward to seeing you tomorrow.

Yours truly,
Ma’am

Dear Sir/Madam,

Attached herewith is a list of proposed acquisition in line with my proposal to upgrade your household facilities. I have already made initial survey of current market prices. Note however that prices could vary depending on the prevailing exchange rate and aggregate supply and demand which we also monitor on an hourly basis.

- si inday, nagpapaalam bumili ng bagong electric fan
=======================================
NEXT ARTICLE:

SINU-SINO ANG MGA BAKLA AT TOMBOY SA KONGRESO?

Sinu-sino ang mga bakla at tomboy sa Kongreso?

Image Source

“I have been telling them, you are not under-represented… actually you are over-represented in the Lower House and Upper House.” – COMELEC Second Division Chairman Nicodemus Ferrer

Ito ang sinabi ni COMELEC Commissioner Ferrer hinggil sa isyu ng pagdiskwalipika sa Ang Ladlad, ang organisasyong nagrerepresenta sa mga Pilipinong lesbiyana, bakla, at transgender upang makasali sa 2010 elections under the party-list system.

Nagbigay ng dalawang teksto mula sa Bibliya at Q'uran  sina Ferrer at nang dalawa pang commissioners upang maging basehan nito bagay na ikinagulat ng President ng  Ang Ladlad na si Dante Remoto Tino-tolerate daw ng Ang Ladlad ang immorality kaya't hindi ito papayagan ng COMELEC. Siguro naaasiwa ang mga commissioners na ito sa mga bakla. Hehehe.

Pero nakaagaw ng pansin yong sinabi ni Ferrer na hindi daw under-represented ang mga bakla at tomboy sa Kongreso. Ibig sabihin ba nito na may mga bakla at tomboy tayong mga Kongresista at Senador? At ano naman kung meron? Hmmm. Napag-isip tuloy ako. Mukhang may alam itong si Ferrer sa mga pribadong buhay ng mga kagalang-galang na Kongresista at mga Senador.

Ang desisyong ito ng COMELEC ay mariing binatikos naman ng maka-kaliwang grupo at ilang personalidad sa gobyerno tulad nina Sen. Loren Legarda at Joker Arroyo.

==============================================

NEXT ARTICLE: 

INDAY JOKES PART 4

INDAY JOKES PART 4

Image Source 

Inday’s rants when the entire family left for Enchanted Kingdom without her.

P500 – sun plan subscription
P1800 – glutathione 30 capsules
P600 – Olay Total Effects
P1500 – Crocs flip flops
P2000 – for mama

- Inday’s budget for the month of October
================================================
Boss: Inday! Bakit diyan mo pinapakain sa sahig si JR! Ang dum-dumi jan! Bluebaby pa naman ‘yan! (Inday, why did you let JR eat on the floor. It’s so dirty. Don’t forget, he’s a blue baby.)
Inday: Haller! What do you think of me, a moron?! “Blue spells” or “tet spells” of acute hypoxia usually occur during feeding. Squatting in ambulatory in a child with a tetralogy of fallout as a compensatory mechanism increases systematic resistance in venous return, briefly decreasing hypoxia! Now, you choose, you still want to see him alive, but with rashes or let him rest in peace?!

Boss: (collapsed)
====================================

Stop your raucous behavior. It is bound to result in property damages and if that happens there will be corresponding punishment to be inflicted upon you!
-si Inday, pinagbabawalan ang mga bata na maglikot.
====================================
“To forrestall further hopes of acquaintance, my unfathomable statement to the denial of your request. Petition denied.”

-reply ni Inday nang i-text ni dodong kung pwede sya maging txtmate.
====================================
Donya: Bakit tuwing paguwi ko, nadadatnan kitang nanunuod ng tv?!

Inday: Because I don’t want you to see me doing absolutely nothing.
====================================
“It’s absurd! It was never a fact that he will inflict a fight. I can only imagine how you handle schizophrenic kids on this educational institution. Revise your policies because they suck!”

-Inday, kasama si Junior sa principal’s office.
====================================
Amo: Inday, bakit nagkalat ang basura sa likod ng bahay?!

Inday: A change in the weather patterns might have occurred wrecking havoc to the surroundings. The way the debris are scattered indicates that the gust of wind was going northeast causing damage to the path it was heading for.

Amo: (nosebleed)
====================================
Amo: Inday bumili ka nga ng mga isda, ay oo nga pala, inglesera ka na ngayon, would you please buy many fishes for this week’s meals?

Inday: Judging by your statement, I believe you meant a variety of fish. The term fishes though rarely used, connotes a plethora of different kinds of the said gilled aquatic creatures. But the most pressing question before I go to the wet market would be: what type of fish? Fillet or not? Frozen or fresh? (pauses) Ahh…given the meager budget afforded by this household’s quasi-peasant class taste, I assume I shall source the staple “galewng-gong”. Yes?

Amo: Eh kung mag-empake ka na kaya?!
====================================
Dear Mom,

Had i not been able to smell the salt, i must have collapsed moments ago. Junior has become a little monster to me. Remember the head accident he had? As if it wasn’t enough, he was summoned by the principal of his shabilly run academe. Oh, such an erudite bunch of baboons! I never thought being a governess can be such strenuous employ!

Your daughter,
Inday

Dear Inday,

Walanghiya ka! Magpadala ka ng pera! Nasa ospital ang nanay mo, dumugo ang ilong pagkabasa ng pesteng sulat mo!

–TATAY
=======================================
NEXT ARTICLE: 


CON-ASS: WHO ARE THE CRIMINALS?

CON-ASS: WHO ARE THE CRIMINALS?

This is the full list of the 171 members of the House of Representatives who signed the House Resolution 1109, a resolution calling upon the members of Congress to convene for the purpose of considering proposals to amend or revise the Constitution.

ABANTE, BIENVENIDO M. “BENNY” 6TH District Pandacan
ABLAN, ROQUE R. JR, Ilocos Norte, 1st District
AGBAYANI, VICTOR AGUEDO E. Pangasinan, 2nd District
AGYAO, MANUEL, S Kalinga Province
ALBANO (III), RODOLFO T. Isabela, 1st District
ALFELOR, FELIX R. JR. 4th District, Camarines Sur
ALMARIO, THELMA Z. Davao Oriental, 2nd District
ALVAREZ, ANTONIO C. Palawan 1st District
ALVAREZ, GENARO RAFAEL M. JR. Negros Occidental, 6th District
AMANTE, EDELMIRO A. Agusan Del Norte, 2nd District
AMATONG, ROMMEL C. Compostela Valley, 2nd District
ANGPING, MARIA ZENAIDA B. Manila, 3rd District
ANTONINO, RODOLFO W. Nueva Ecija, 4th District
APOSTOL, TRINIDAD G. Leyte, 2nd District
AQUINO, JOSE S. (II) 1st District Agusan del Norte
ARAGO, MARIA EVITA R. 3rd district, Laguna
ARBISON, A MUNIR M. Sulu 2nd District
ARENAS, MA. RACHEL J. Pangasinan, 3rd District
ARROYO, DIOSDADO M. Camarines Sur, 1st District
ARROYO, IGNACIO T. 5th district Negros Occidental
ARROYO, JUAN MIGUEL M. 2nd District of Pampanga
BAGATSING, AMADO S. Manila 5th district
BALINDONG, PANGALIAN M. Lanao del Sur, 2nd District
BARZAGA, ELPIDIO F. JR. Cavite, 2nd District
BAUTISTA, FRANKLIN P. Davao Del Sur, 2nd District
BELMONTE, VICENTE F. JR. Lanao del Norte, 1st District
BICHARA, AL FRANCIS C. Albay, 2nd District
BIRON, FERJENEL G. Iloilo, 4th District
BONDOC, ANNA YORK P. Pampanga 4th District
BONOAN-DAVID, MA. THERESA B. Manila, 4th District
BRAVO, NARCISO R. JR. Masbate, 1st District
BRIONES, NICANOR M. AGAP Party list
BUHAIN, EILEEN ERMITA Batangas, 1st District
BULUT, ELIAS C. JR. Apayao Lone District
CAGAS (IV), MARC DOUGLAS C. Davao Del Sur, 1st District
CAJAYON, MARY MITZI L. Caloocan, 2nd District
CAJES, ROBERTO C. Bohol, 2nd District
CARI, CARMEN L. Leyte, 5th District
CASTRO, FREDENIL H. Capiz, 2nd District
CELESTE, ARTHUR F. Pangasinan, 1st District
CERILLES, ANTONIO H. Zamboanga Del Sur, 2nd District
CHATTO, EDGARDO M. Bohol, 1st District
CHONG, GLENN A. Biliran, Lone District
CHUNG-LAO, SOLOMON R. Ifugao, Lone District
CLARETE, MARINA C. Misamis Occidental, 1st District
CODILLA, EUFROCINO M. SR. Leyte, 4th District
COJUANCO, MARK O. Pangasinan, 5th District
COQUILA, TEODULO M. Eastern Samar, Lone District
CRISOLOGO, VINCENT P. Quezon City, 1st District
CUA, JUNIE E. Quirino, Lone District
CUENCO, ANTONIO V. Cebu City, 2nd District
DANGWA, SAMUEL M. Benguet, Lone District
DATUMANONG, SIMEON A. Maguindanao, Lone District
DAYANGHIRANG, Nelson L. Davao Oriental, 1st District
DAZA, NANETTE C. Quezon City, 4th District
DAZA, PAUL R. Northern Samar, 1st District
DE GUZMAN, DEL R. Marikina City, 2nd District
DEFENSOR, ARTHUR D. SR. Iloilo, 3rd District
DEFENSOR, MATIAS V. JR. Quezon City, 3rd District
DEL MAR, RAUL V. Cebu City, 1st District
DIASNES, CARLO OLIVER D. (MD) Batanes, Lone District
DIMAPORO, ABDULLAH D. Lanao Del Norte, 2nd District
DOMOGAN, MAURICIO G. Baguio, Lone District
DUAVIT, MICHAEL JOHN R. Rizal, 1st District
DUENAS, HENRY M. JR. Taguig, 2nd District (2nd Councilor District)
DUMARPA, FAYSAH MRP. Lanao del Sur, 1st District
DUMPIT, THOMAS L. JR. La Union, 2nd District
DURANO (IV), RAMON H. 5th District, Cebu
ECLEO, GLENDA B. Dinagat Islands, Lone District
EMANO, YEVGENY VICENTE B. Misamis Oriental, 2nd District
ENVERGA, WILFRIDO MARK M. Quezon, 1st District
ESTRELLA, CONRADO M. (III) Pangasinan, 6th District
ESTRELLA, ROBERT RAYMUND M. ABONO Party List
FERRER, JEFFREY P. Negros Occidental, 4th District
GARAY, FLORENCIO C. Surigao Del Sur, 2nd District
GARCIA, ALBERT S. Bataan, 2nd District.
GARCIA, PABLO JOHN F. Cebu, 3rd District
GARCIA, PABLO P. Cebu, 2nd District
GARCIA, VINCENT J. Davao City, 2nd District
GARIN, JANETTE L. Iloilo, 1st District
GATCHALIAN, REXLON T. Valenzuela City, 1st District
GATLABAYAN, ANGELITO C. Antipolo City, 2nd District
GO, ARNULFO F. Sultan Kudarat, 2nd District
GONZALES, AURELIO D. JR. Pampanga 3rd District
GONZALES, RAUL T. JR. Ilo ilo City
GULLAS, EDUARDO R. Cebu, 1st District
GUNIGUNDO, MAGTANGGOL T. Valenzuela City 2nd District
HOFER, DULCE ANN K. Zamboanga Sibugay, 2nd District
JAAFAR, NUR G. Tawi-Tawi, Lone District
JALA, ADAM RELSON L. Bohol, 3rd District
JALOSJOS, CESAR G. Zamboanga del Norte, 3rd District
JALOSJOS-CARREON, CECILIA G. Zamboanga del Norte, 1st District
JIKIRI, YUSOP H. Sulu, 1st District
KHO, ANTONIO T. Masbate, 2nd District
LABADLABAD, ROSENDO S. Zamboanga del Norte, 2nd District
LACSON, JOSE CARLOS V. Negros Occidental, 3rd District
LAGDAMEO, ANTONIO F. JR. Davao del Norte, 2nd District
LAPUS, JECI A. Tarlac, 3rd District
LAZATIN, CARMELO F. Pampanga, 1st District
LIM, RENO G. Albay, 3rd District
LOPEZ, JAIME C. Manila, 2nd District
MADRONA, ELEANORA JESUS F. Romblon, Lone District
MAGSAYSAY, MARIA MILAGROS H. Zambales, 1st District
MALAPITAN, OSCAR G. Caloocan, 1st District
MAMBA, MANUEL N. Cagayan, 3rd District
MANGUDADATU, DATU PAKUNG S. Sultan Kudarat,
MARANON, ALFREDO D. III Negros Occidental, 2nd District
MATUGAS, FRANCISCO T. Surigao del Norte, 1st District
MENDOZA, MARK LEANDRO L. Batangas, 4th District
MERCADO, ROGER G. Southern Leyte, Lone District
MIRAFLORES, FLORENCIO T. Aklan, Lone District
NAVA, JOAQUIN CARLOS RAHMAN A. (MD) Guimaras, Lone District
NICOLAS, REYLINA G. Bulacan, 4th District
NOGRALES, PROSPERO C. Davao City, 1st District
OLAñO, ARREL R. Davao Del Norte, 1st District
ONG, EMIL L. Northern Samar, 2nd District
ORTEGA, VICTOR FRANCISCO C. La Union, 1st District
PABLO, ERNESTO C. APEC Party List
PANCHO, PEDRO M. Bulacan, 2nd District
PANCRUDO, CANDIDO P. JR. Bukidnon, 1st District
PICHAY, PHILIP A. Surigao Del Sur, 1st District
PIñOL, BERNARDO F. JR. North Cotabato, 2nd District
PUNO, ROBERTO V. Antipolo City, 1st District
RAMIRO, HERMINIA M. Misamis Occidental, 2nd District
REMULLA, JESUS CRISPIN C. Cavite, 3rd District
REYES, CARMELITA O. Marinduque, Lone District
REYES, VICTORIA H. Batangas, 3rd District
ROBES, ARTURO G. San Jose Del Monte City, Lone District
RODRIGUEZ-ZALDARRIAGA, Adelina Rizal, 2nd District
ROMAN, HERMINIA B. Bataan, 1st District
ROMARATE, GUILLERMO A. JR. Surigao del Norte, 2nd District
ROMUALDEZ, FERDINAND MARTIN G. Leyte, 1st District
ROMUALDO, PEDRO Camiguin, Lone District
ROMULO, ROMAN T. Pasig City, Lone District
ROXAS, JOSE ANTONIO F. Pasay City
SALIMBANGON, BENHUR L. Cebu, 4th District
SALVACION JR., ANDRES D. Leyte, 3rd District
SAN LUIS, EDGAR S. Laguna, 4th District
SANDOVAL, ALVIN S. Malabon-Navotas, Lone District
SANTIAGO, JOSEPH A. Catanduanes, Lone District
SANTIAGO, NARCISO D. (III) ARC Party List
SEACHON-LANETE, RIZALINA L. 3rd district of Masbate
SEARES-LUNA, CECILIA M. Abra, Lone District
SILVERIO, LORNA C. Bulacan, 3rd District
SINGSON, ERIC D. Ilocos Sur, 2nd District
SINGSON, RONALD V. Ilocos Sur, 1st District
SOLIS, JOSE G. Sorsogon, 2nd District
SOON-RUIZ, NERISSA CORAZON Cebu, 6th District
SUAREZ, DANILO E. Quezon, 3rd District
SUSANO, MARY ANN L. Quezon City, 2nd District
SY-ALVARADO, MA. VICTORIA R. Bulacan, 1st District
SYJUCO, JUDY J. 2nd Dsitrict, Iloilo
TALINO-MENDOZA, EMMYLOU J. North Cotabato, 1st District
TAN, SHAREE ANN T. Samar, 2nd District
TEODORO, MARCELINO R. Marikina City, 1st District
TEODORO, MONICA LOUISSE PRIETO Tarlac, 1st District
TEVES, PRYDE HENRY A. Negros Oriental, 3rd District
TUPAS, NEIL C. JR. Iloilo, 5th District
UNGAB, ISIDRO T. Davao City, 3rd District
UY, EDWIN C. Isabela, 2nd District
UY, REYNALDO S. Samar, 1st District
UY, ROLANDO A. Cagayan De Oro City, Lone District
VALDEZ, EDGAR L. APEC Party List
VALENCIA, RODOLFO G. Oriental Mindoro, 1st District
VARGAS, FLORENCIO L. Cagayan, 2nd District
VILLAFUERTE, LUIS R. Camarines Sur, 2nd District
VILLAROSA, MA. AMELITA C. Occidental Mindoro, Lone District
VIOLAGO, JOSEPH GILBERT F. Nueva Ecija, 2nd District
YAP, JOSE V. Tarlac, 2nd District
YU, VICTOR J. Zamboanga Del Sur, 1st District
ZAMORA, MANUEL E. 1st District, Compostela Valley
ZIALCITA, EDUARDO C. Parañaque, 1st District

I am a registered voter of Tabontabon, Leyte, part of the 2nd disctrict and all I can say to Congresswoman Trinidad Apostol: shame on you and the others for approving House Resolution 1109! His husband, former Presidential Legal Adviser of President Gloria Macapagal-Arroyo, will be running as Congressman in 2010 elections, and for sure, I will never vote for him.

If your representative is on the list above, do not vote for him/her in 2010 elections (if that official filed his/her certificate of candidacy).
======================================
NEXT ARTICLE:


INDAY JOKES PART 3

INDAY JOKES PART 3

Image Source

Employer: Why does my son (Junjun) have a bump on his head?

Inday: Compromising safety with useless aesthetics, the not-so-well-engineered architectural design of our kitchen lavatory affected the boy’s cranium with a slight boil at the left temple near the auditory organ.
=========================================
Employer: Why is the food salty?

Inday: The consistency was fine. But you see, it seems that the increased amount of sodium chloride (NaCl) affected the taste drastically, and those actions are irreversible. I do apologize.
==========================================
Baon ni Junjun sa school:

-drunken shrimp and blue lobster meat with caviar serve with milagrosa rice (red variety) and apricot sauce
-vegetables in balsamic vinegar splashed with extra virgin olive oil
-lychee and peach salad with sour cream and cream cheese topped with lemon zests
==========================================
Reaction sa palengke vendor nang malamang kulang ng 2 guhit ang nabiling tilapia
“How dare you insulate that I could tolerate such a diabolical insult from a crap of humanity such as you! I would rather be deceived than to talk with you! You haven’t heard the last of me yet you scoundrel, you nincompoop! You fiendish creature!”
========================================
When Inday goes to the public market:

“Attached herewith is a list of proposed acquisition in line with my proposal to procure and purchase your household essentials. I have already made initial survey of current market prices. Note however that prices could vary depending on the prevailing exchange rate and aggregate supply and demand which I also monitor in ANC on a regular basis.“
=========================================
Inday asking for a dayoff:

“Physical stress and excessive work may result to serious damage to one’s body. It is therefore essential that once in a while, we take a break from our usual routine to replenish the lost energy we once had.”
==========================================
Doña Anna: Inday, ba’t sinisipon si Junior?

Inday: He came in direct contact with surfaces contaminated with rhinoviruses which entered the cells of the lining of his nasopharynx which in turn rapidly multiplied. Thus, giving him a viral infectious disease of the upper respiratory system called acute viral nasopharyngitis.

Amo: What? Tumawag ka ng ambulansya! Bilis!

Inday: Hayy, you’re so ignorant. As if you have not been afflicted with the common cold in the course of your existence.
=========================================
“Did it ever occur to you that the ultraviolet rays of the idiot box can bring harmful radiation to the retinal area? It could lead to blurred vision, worse, permanent blindness?

- Inday’s words upon seeing that Junior was watching too close to the television.

=========================================
NEXT ARTICLE:

ANG ELEVATOR AT ANG HAGDAN

ANG ELEVATOR AT ANG HAGDAN

Bob Ong's Books

“Parang elevator lang yan eh, bakit mo ipagsisiksikan 'yong sarili mo kung walang pwesto para sa'yo. Eh meron namang hagdan, ayaw mo lang pansinin.” --BOB ONG--

Si Bob Ong na siguro ang pinakapaborito kong manunulat na Pilipino pagdating sa tema ng kakwelahan at kung papano nya inilalarawan ang araw-araw na pamumuhay ng karaniwang Pilipino. Ang pinakaunang libro ni Bob Ong na nabasa ko ay yong iniregalo sa akin ni Kuya Tata, kaibigan ko sa Davao. Salamat, Kuya Tata! Yong title ng libro ay ABNKKBSNPLAko?! na sinulat noong 2001. Actually, wala akong ibang libro ni Bob Ong kundi ito lang, hehehe, pero balak kong bumili ng kumpletong set. Pitong libro na ang nasusulat ni Bong Ong, yong pinakahuli ay ung Kapitan Sino, published this year lang.

Anyway, isa sa mga sinabi ni Bob Ong ay yong sinulat ko sa taas. “Parang elevator lang yan eh, bakit mo ipagsisiksikan 'yong sarili mo kung walang pwesto para sa'yo. Eh meron namang hagdan, ayaw mo lang pansinin.” Napakasimple yong sinabi niya ngunit puno ito ng makahulugang interpretasyon. Sa literature, natutunan ko na maaari mong i-interpret ang isang pyesa in at least two ways. Yong una ay yong literal na lebel ng interpretasyon at yong pangalawa ay ung tinatawag na metaphorical. Ito ang ginamit ni Bob Ong para maisalarawan niya ang lugar ng isang tao sa buhay ng iba.

Maaaring ang tinutukoy ni Bob Ong sa sinabi niya ay patungkol sa relasyon ng dalawa o mahigit pang tao. It could refer to a love triangle, pwede ring love rectangle, o di naman kaya love pentangle. Hehehehe. Person A loves Person B, but Person B loves Person C and Person C loves Person B reciprocally. And here is Person D na may lihim na pagtingin naman kay Person A. Person A is doing everything para lang mapansin ni B but to no avail. Nakatali ang puso ni B kay C. On the other hand, D has these gestures and small kinds of deeds for A pero wa epek ito sa kanya. Argumento ni Bob Ong, bakit kailangang ipagsiksikan ni A yong sarili niya sa relasyon nina B and C? Katangahan lamang ito. Bakit hindi niya pansinin si D gayong alam naman niya na may gusto ito sa kanya? Si D ang hagdang katabi lamang ng elevator na gustong sakyan ni A ngunit puno na ito at hindi na maaari pang gamitin. Masalimuot na mga relasyon ngunit nangyayari sa totoong buhay. It causes grief to both A and D. Mga pusong unti-unting dinudurog, nagbibigay ng sobrang sakit sa puso at isip.

Kaya't sumasang-ayon ako sa argumento ni Bob Ong na huwag mo nang ipagsiksikan ang sarili mo kung wala ka nang puwang sa puso ng isang tao. Masakit ngunit kailangan mong tanggapin na 'ang buhay ay weather-weather lang.' Ayon ito kay Kuya Kim. Ibaling mo ang iyong atensyon sa iba. Malay mo, ginto pala ang nasa kaliwa mo. Ayaw mo lang pansinin. At yong kinahuhumalingan mo sa kanan ay bronze lang pala, di ba?

Alam mo bang maaari din itong mangyari sa magkakaibigan?
========================================================
NEXT ARTICLE: 

INDAY JOKES PART 2

INDAY JOKES PART 2

 Image Source

The consistency was fine. But you see, it seems that the increased amount of sodium chloride affected the taste drastically and those actions are irreversible. I do apologize.

-nag-eexplain si inday kung bakit maalat ang ulam.
========================================
“Nurture others with positive truthful words, not words that hurt. It doesn’t cost anything to do so. But mean what you say, and say what you mean. Do it everyday. This is one of the most obvious qualities of the most beloved people. If you cannot be generous financially, at least be generous with your words.”

-sagot ni inday sa amo nya na di xa pinautang at minura-mura pa!
========================================
“Ipomea aquatica has become the constant ingredient to this Filipino delicacy which is very helpful in the digestion during the peristaltic process of the food we intake. Due to the continuous rain and floods, the harvest of the said vegetable has lessen the production in the market”

-sagot ni inday samin kung bakit walang KangKong sa nilutong sinigang
========================================
I am solitary. I find it hard to succumb into slumber. Though the downpour of rain should’ve made it easy. This exuberent emotional glue i have for you,cannot be simply washed away. The multiplicity of what i feel for you is inevitable. This isn’t platonic. It’s real, true romance

-INDAY, nag eemote sa may bintana, habang iniisip si dodong,ang bf nia..
========================================
“potatoes, when consumed in their raw state, are rapidly converted to glucose that raises insulin levels because of its simple sugar…when cooked in high temperature like french fries, they produce large amount of free radicals in the body causing ageing, clotting, inflammation, cancer, wait guys… 1 french fry is worse than 1 cigarette

-inday (sagot nya sa amo nung tanungin xa kung bakit di sya nagluto ng french fries) nutritionist din pala si inday
========================================
Heavy fire exerted by the stimulus affected the best conductor of heat which is the steel,causing the Oriza Sativa to change it’s state of color,smell as well as the taste.”

-sagot ni inday ng tanungin siya ng amo kung bakit nasunog ang sinaing.
========================================
Listening to the nonsense talk about someone’s life is a pathetic way of entertainment..it doesn’t contribute to the good of society..i hate character assassinators!..

-reklamo ni inday nang natsismis siya ng kapitbahay.
========================================
Drunken shrimp and blue lobster meat with caviar served with milagrosa rice (red variety) and apricot sauce..
Vegetables in balsamic vinegar splashed with extra virgin olive oil ..
Lychee and peach salad with sour cream and cream cheese topped with lemon zests..

-mga baon ni junjun sa daycare na inihanda ni Inday. SOSYAL!!!
========================================
Ich bin jetzt berühmt geworden dürch diesen Pexer.Mach weiter so,das gefällt mir!!!

(naging sikat ako ngayon gawa ng pexer, pagpatuloy ninyo gusto ko yan)
-Si Inday marunong din pala maggerman!!
========================================
Compromising safety with useless aesthetics, the not-so-well engineered architectural design of our kitchen lavatory affected the boy’s cranium with a slight boil at the left temple near the auditory organ.

-sagot ni Inday nang tanungin ng amo kung bakit may bukol si Junior.
=======================================
NEXT ARTICLE:

LIST OF CANDIDATES (TO BE APPROVED BY COMELEC) IN THE 2010 ELECTIONS

LIST OF CANDIDATES (TO BE APPROVED BY COMELEC) IN THE 2010 NATIONAL ELECTIONS (PER POLITICAL PARTY)

Image Source

Ang Kapatiran Party
President: JC de los Reyes, Olongapo City Councilor
Vice-President: Atty. Jun Chipeco, director of St. John Colleges, Inc.
Senators: Lito David, former Concurrent Direcor for Political Affairs -Jaworki's office
              Jo Imbong, lawyer
              Jess Paredes, lawyer
              Grace Rinoza Plazo, lawyer         
              Adrian Sison, lawyer             
                 Reginald Tamayo, Cagayan Councilor
              Hector Tarranoza, Philippine Air Force colonel
              Danny Valdehuesa, Gising Barangay Movement, Inc. president

Image Source

Bangon Pilipinas Party (BPP)
President: Bro. Eddie Villanueva, Spiritual Director of Jesus Is Lord Church Worldwide
Vice-President: Perfecto Yasay, former Chiarman of Securities and Exchange Commission 
Senators: Alex Tinsay, former GMA broadcaster
              Kata Inosencio, former ABS-CBN broadcaster
              Ramoncito Ocampo, El Shaddai preacher/lawyer
              Zafrullah Alonto, Muslim scholar
              Israel Virgines, representing the academe from the 7th-Day Adventist Church

Image Source 

Lakas-Kampi-CMD
President: Sec. Gilberto Teodoro, Department of National Defense Secretary
Vice-President: Edu Manzano, TV host and actor
Senators: Sen. Lito Lapid, current Senator 
              Sen. Bong Revilla, current Senator
              Silvestre Bello III, cabinet secretary
              Rey Langit, broadcaster
              Ramon Guico, Binalonan (Pangasinan) Mayor
              Raul Lambino, lawyer 

Image Source

Liberal Party (LP)
President: Noynoy Aquino, current Senator
Vice-President: Mar Roxas, current Senator
Senators: Risa Hontiveros-Baraquel, Anakbayan party-list representative (guest candidate)
              Ralph Recto, former NEDA chairman
              Nereus Acosta, lawyer
              Ruffy Biazon, congressman of Muntinlupa City
              Teofisto Guingona III, son of former Vice-President Teofisto Guingona
              Sonia Roco, wife of late Senator Raul Roco (guest candidate)
                Danilo Lim, detained Brigader General (guest candidate)
              Alexander Lacson, civil society leader/lawyer
              Martin Bautista, a doctor
              Franklin Drilon, former Senate President
             Yasmin Busrao-Lao, peace and civil advocate

Image Source

Nacionalista Party (NP)
President: Sen. Manny Villar, current Senator
Vice-President: Sen. Loren Legarda, current Senator
Senators: Adel Tamano, lawyer
              Gwendolyn Pimentel-Gana, lawyer
              Susan Ople,son of former DFA Sec. Blas Ople
              Ramon Mitra III, son of the former House Speaker Ramon Mitra, Jr.        
              Col. Ariel Querubin, retired Marine Colonel
              Rep. Bongbong Marcos, son of former President Ferdinand Marcos   
              Vicente Sotto, former Senator      
              Sen. Pia Cayetano, current Senator
              Sen. Ramon Revilla, Jr. (guest candidate)
              Sen. Miriam Defensor-Santiago (guest candidate)      
              Gilbert Remulla, former Representative of Cavite

Image Source

Pwersa ng Masang Pilipino (PMP)President: Joseph Estrada, former President
Vice-President: Jejomar Binay, Makati City Mayor
Senators: Senate President Juan Ponce Enrile
              Jinggoy Estrada, Senate Pro-tempore
              Jayvee Bautista, Sanlakas party-list representative
              Rodolfo "Ompong" Plaza, Agusan del Sur representative
              Jose Apolinario "Jun" Lozada, former representative of Negros Occidental
              Jose de Venecia III, businessman and ZTE-NBN whistle-blower
              Sen. Ramon Revilla, Jr., current Senator (guest candidate)
              Sen. Miriam Defensor-Santiago, current Senator (guest candidate)
              Danilo Lim, detained Brigader General (guest candidate)
           
Other Candidates
President: Jamby Madrigal, current Senator, Independent
                Nicanor Perlas
                Richard Gordon, current Senator, Bagumbayan

Vice-President: Bayani Fernando, former MMDA Chairman
                       Jay Sonza, UNTV 37's station manager, Kilusang Bagong Lipunan


Senators: Satur Ocampo, Bayan Muna representative
               Lisa Maza, Gabriela Women's Party representative
               Romeo Maganto, retired Police General, independent
               Jovito Palparan, Jr., Bantay party-list representative
               Imelda Papin, jukebox queen and former vice-governor of Camarines Sur, KBL
               Amado Calderon, former COMELEC commissioner, Lapiang Manggagawa
               Fransisco Tatad, former Senator, GAD
               Lito Osmena, former Cebu governor, Promdi
               Danton Remoto, gay activist, Ang Ladlad
               Adrian Sison
               Mary Grace Poe-Llamanzares
               Teddy Locsin
 ==========================================
NEXT ARTICLE:


THE GREAT OBLATION RUN 2009

THE GREAT OBLATION RUN 2009

 Image Source 

What: The Great Oblation Run 2009
Where: AS Steps, Palma Hall Building, University of the Philippines (UP) Diliman, Quezon City
When: 15 December 2009 (Tuesday), 12:00 noon
Organizers: Alpha Phi Omega (APO) Fraternity

The month of December is considered to be the APO Month. Members commemorate the founding of the organization 83 years ago, December 16, 1925. Alpha Phi Omega is the largest collegiate fraternity in the US and it has 250 chapters here in the Philippines.

The Oblation Run is an annual event conducted in several constituent universities of the University of the Philippines. In UP Visayas Tacloban, where I graduated, UP-based APO also conducts Oblation Run yearly. About 30 naked students streak around the AS Grounds holding placards with signs on them like "Serve The People," "No to Oil Price Increase," "Junk Cha-Cha," "Oust GMA," and other issues confronting the University and the Filipino society in general. The run started in 1977 in defiance to the banning of the movie, “Hubad na Bayani.” The movie depicted human rights abuses during the Martial Law era. The event continues today as a collective action of protests.

On June 18  this year, 100 fraternity members and alumni sprinted naked along the campus streets of UP Diliman to commemorate the centennial anniversary of the premier state university of the country. Jejomar Binay (the vice-presidential candidate under the political party, Pwersa ng Masang Pilipino in the 2010 Philippine elections), an alumnus of UP and a member of Alpha Phi Omega, spearheaded the opening ceremony of the UP Centennial Run. UP is now the only national university of the Philippines after Philippine Congress declared it as the national university by virtue of Republic Act 9500, signed by President Gloria Macapagal-Arroyo on the 28th day of April 2008.
==================================================
NEXT ARTICLE:

INDAY JOKES PART 1

INDAY JOKES PART 1

Image Source

Doña Anna: Inday ano ulam natin? Darating na ang Señor mo.

Inday: Due to the frequent mass media coverage on hog cholera, I’ve consequently given a judgment on sauteing exquisite scallops in unsalted butter together with pungent white onion and tossed it with brisk asparagus. I’ve also assented to twist it with fresh lemonzest and advance its taste via blending a petty amount of chardonay white wine as well as a cup of viscous cream.

Doña Anna: Puta!
=========================================
Doña Anna: Inday, bakit mo binenta ‘yong sirang silya?

Inday: I have computed the chair’s fair value less cost to sell and the value in use using projections for 5 years and a pretax discount rate. Accordingly, the value in use is lower, so I decided to sell the chair, in accordance with PAS (Phil. Acctg. Standard) 18 on Revenue, PAS16 on Property, Plant and Equipment, & PAS36 on Asset Impairment!

Doña Anna: Fuck off!
=========================================
“Higher stock index and the low flow of investments triggered the inflation of the peso. Thus, your purchasing power is weak!

-Inday’s explanation when she was asked why the change she gave to Doña Anna was not enough.
=========================================
Doña: Inday, bumili ka nga ng mga isda. Ay oo nga pala, inglesera ka na ngayon. Would you please buy many fishes for this week’s meals?

Inday: Judging from your statement, I believe you meant a variety of fish. The term ‘fishes’ although rarely used, connotes a plethora of different kinds of the said gilled aquatic creatures. But the more pressing questions before I go to the wet market would be: what type of fish? Fillet or not? Frozen or fresh? (pauses) Aahh. Given the meager budget afforded by this household’s quasi-peasant class taste, I assume I shall source the staple “ga-lewng-gong.” Am i correct?

Doña: Leche!
=========================================
“Allergens triggerd the immune response. Eosinophilic migration occurs to the reaction site and release of chemotactic and anaphylotoxin including histamine and prostglandins. These substances result to an increase in circulationn to the site promoting redness.”

- Inday’s reply when asked why there were rashes in her ward Junior’s skin.
==========================================
NEXT ARTICLE:

MY ISSUE WITH THE CIVIL SERVICE COMMISSION

My Issue with the Civil Service Commission

About two months ago, I was again trying to apply for the Civil Service Examination. The Civil Service Commission has this new process where applicants could request for an appointment date for the actual filing and processing of their respective Application Forms. This is only applicable to those who want to take the exam through a Computer-Assisted Test. Applicants need only to log on at CSC's official website and click the link to Online CSE-CAT Appointment Reservation System (OCARS). 

On October 19, 2009 I was so excited to apply, and knowing that only 35 applicants would be accepted, I rushed to Netopia Internet Cafe at 12 noontime. OCARS would be available by 1:00 PM. It was one o'clock already but every time I tried accessing the link, there was always an error. I did the same process until around 1:30pm, I read a note from the website that there was no more available slot. I was really frustrated and dismayed. I could not believe it. This was my second attempt. So I thought of writing to the officials of Civil Service Commission. I really just want to tell them how frustrated I was with the system. At about 2:00pm, I sent the following email to 6 email addresses, all to the concerned officials.

=======================================================

Hi,

Good afternoon.

I am online right now trying to apply for an appointment for the Civil Service Examination this November. I've been online since 12 noon. It's 1:30pm already, and I still could not access the OCARS. This is my second time trying to apply via internet. I am a bit frustrated. What should I do? Can you please help me?

Thank you so much.

Marlon Raquel

 ==========================================================

To my surprise, someone from the CSC replied to my email after seven (7) days. I was thinking they would just ignore it. Ms. Domingo sent me a reply in a pdf format.

October 26, 2009


Marlon Raquel
maher_shalal05@yahoo.com.ph


Dear Mr. Raquel,

This refers to your email about the problem you experienced while trying to register for the Computer Assisted Test (CAT) through the Online CSE-CAT Application  Reservation System (OCARS) on October 19, 2009.

Please be informed that the CSC web server had a technical problem at the moment the OCARS should have been accessible. This explains why an error message was displayed when you tried to access the link for the OCARS. The problem with the web server was addressed in due time. However, because a lot of applicants were accessing the OCARS at the same time (nationwide), the slots for the November schedule of the CAT, numbering 140, were filled up in less than an hour.


 The OCARS is accessible only every 3rd Monday of the month for examinations to be conducted in the succeeding month. For December schedule of the CAT, you may access the OCARS on November 16, 2009.

Rest assured that the Commission is continuously improving its systems and procedures to provide better service to the clients.

Very truly yours,

MARIAN J. DOMINGO

Chief Personnel Specialist

Examination, Recruitment and Placement Office

 ======================================================

After I read the reply, I thought well, that's fine, better luck next time. I appreciate CSC because they did not ignore my concern. They attended to it, and I am hoping that they would be able to improve their services in the future.

 ========================================================
NEXT ARTICLE:


13TH MONTH PAY LAW: FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS

13TH MONTH PAY LAW: FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS

What is 13th month pay?

It is a form of monetary assistance equivalent to the monthly basic compensation received by an employee, computed pro-rata according to the number of months within a year that an employee has rendered service to an employer (basic monthly pay/12 x number of months actually worked).


Who are entitled to 13th month pay?
All rank and file employees, regardless of status, who have worked for at least one (1) month are entitled to receive 13th month pay.


What if I already worked for one month and I resigned thereafter?
An employee who has resigned or whose services were terminated at any time before the time for payment of the 13th month pay is entitled to 13th month pay, in proportion to the length of time he worked during the year. The formula is: (basic monthly pay/12) x (number of months actually worked). The 13th month may be demanded at the time of effectivity of the resignation/termination. That doesn’t have to be December 24.


Who are rank-and file employees?
All employees not considered as managerial employees are considered rank-and-file employees. A managerial employee, as distinguished from a rank-and-file employee, is one who is vested with powers of prerogatives to lay down and execute management policies and/or to hire, transfer, suspend, lay-off, recall discharge, assign or discipline employees, or to effectively recommend such managerial actions.


Is there a cap, i.e., only those receiving a salary below P1,000 may receive 13th month pay?
Prior to 1986, only those who receive a monthly salary of not more than PhP1,000 are entitled to receive 13th month pay. This cap was removed under Memorandum Order No. 28 issued by former President Corazon Aquino.


When must it be paid?
The 13th month pay shall be paid not later than December 24 of each year. An employer, however, may give to his employees one half (½) of the required 13th month pay before the opening of the regular school year and the other half on before the 24th of December of every year. The frequency of payment of this monetary benefit may be the subject of agreement between the employer and the recognized/collective bargaining agent of the employees.

Could the employer withhold the 13th month pay?
No, the payment of 13th month pay is mandatory, specifically provided under Presidential Decree (P.D.) No. 851. In case of non-payment of 13th month pay, covered employees could complain at the Department of Labor and Employment (DOLE) or the National Labor Relations Commission (NLRC).

Are there employers who are exempted from paying 13th month pay?
Yes. The following employers are not required to pay 13th month pay under P.D. 851, unless the grant thereof have become a policy or practice:
a. The Government and any of its political subdivisions, including government-owned and controlled corporations, excepts those corporations operating essentially as private subsidiaries of the Government.
b. Employers already paying their employees a 13th month pay or more in a calendar year or its equivalent at the time of this issuance.
c. Employers of household helpers and persons in the personal service of another in relation to such workers.
d. Employers of those who are paid on purely commission, boundary, or task basis, and those who are paid a fixed amount for performing specific work, irrespective of the time consumed in the performance thereof, except where the workers are paid on piece-rate basis in which case the employer shall grant the required 13th month pay to such workers.


Who are those paid on a piece-rate basis?
They are workers paid a standard amount for every piece or unit of work produced that is more or less regularly replicated, without regard to the time spent in producing the same.


What if I work in more than one company?
Workers who work in two or more companies or private employers, whether on full or part time basis, are entitled to the required 13th month pay from all their private employers regardless of their total earnings from each or all their employers.


Is it part of the Company bonus?
No. The payment of 13th month pay is mandated by law. It is separate from any other bonus given by the company. Read the previous discussion.


Is 13th month pay taxable?
No, as long as the amount does not exceed P30,000. Only the amount in excess of P30,000 is taxable.


Reference:
http://jlp-law.com/blog/faq-on-13th-month-pay/



======================================================
NEXT ARTICLE:

10TH NATIONAL YOUTH CONVENTION OF FOURSQUARE PHILIPPINES

10th National Youth Convention of The Foursquare Church in the Philippines

What: 10th National Youth Convention
Where: Baguio Convention Center, Baguio City

When: April 6-9, 2010

I've been a member of the Foursquare Crusaders Youth since I joined The Foursquare Church in 2000, but I have not yet participated in any National Youth Convention where all Foursquare youth all over the Philippines will be convening for a fellowship. I have attended one national convention of the Foursquare Philippines but that was a convention-at-large, meaning, all members of the church were welcomed to register and participate, and that was in Dagupan City, Pangasinan. Thanks to Marc Salboro and her mother, Ate Hely, for they were the ones who shouldered the expenses.

I am hoping and praying that I could attend the youth convention next year. It is being held once every two years. The last youth convention was conducted in Bacolod City in 2008.
=====================================================
NEXT ARTICLE:


13TH MONTH PAY LAW: GUIDELINES